Men and Relationships

Hah, so I had a typo as I typed in the title.....Realationships.  Which of course was probably Freudian, because we all want a real relationship. One based on trust, consideration and respect. And yes, who are we kidding, we want the sparks, the attraction, you want to feel good about the person you are with physically and emotionally.

But if you have always fucked up in this area, then how to get to that. How do you get to where you have complete trust in someone else. For me, it is examining what went wrong in the past and learning from it.  Which isn't always easy, but when it comes down to it, I could just be like Opposite George (ala Seinfeld).  

I said last night that I consider myself the eternal optimist.  I get knocked down by love and it may take me awhile to get up and dust myself off, but I inevitably always do.  It's almost like breathing, an uncontrolled physical response.  I also fashion myself like Samantha, from Sex and the City, but I think that there may a little Charlotte in me as well.  Which leads me to hope, hope that eventually, I will find that someone for me.  My tv comparisons are never ending.

And don't get me wrong, I am very happy in my own skin and life, and don't peruse the personals. This isn't a quest to find Mr. Wonderful. I would hope that Mr. Wonderful would pop up when you least expect it. Timing however, is everything.

Which leads me to today. Or rather tomorrow. I have a date. And I could think of a million reasons why I shouldn't go. Why I KNOW it will only end eventually and how this date is so out of my box and my comfort zone, and so totally not at all what I would think of when I think of a potential boyfriend.  But then, last time I checked, I was not a fortune teller or a psychic. I do have good instincts, however, and so my instincts say, proceed, but with caution. Because as easily as it could go wrong, it could go right.  It could turn into nothing.  Or it could be wonderful.  

I am after all, the eternal optimist.